Sabbath Rest

I’ve always wondered about the Sabbath. I think sometimes because Jesus said it was ok to do good on the Sabbath we have taken that as free licence to do whatever  -just try to not work at your actual job. This past winter I have tried to do crockpot meals on Sundays, to have everything done so it would feel like I “have it off.” It gave me the freedom to seek Him, to listen to the Spirit or spend time with my family because I was intentional about the things I wasn't going to do. If I truly believe that God gave us a day for Him, just for Him, a day our bodies, spirits and minds need to rest why isn’t my behaviour a reflection of that? What am I passing on to my kids? What do I want them to believe and see a Sabbath being?  I don’t want to sit and stare at a wall all day –that isn’t what I am talking about. More of being mindful of what I am doing and why -& ceasing if necessary. After all, at the end of the day the Lords wants my full submission to Him.

In a book I started reading today called, “The Rest of God.” Mark Buchanan says about working too much, “I was loosing perspective. Fissures in my character worked themselves here and there into cracks. Some widened into ruptures. I grew easily irritable, paranoid, bitter, self-righteous, gloomy. I was often argumentative. I preferred rightness to intimacy. I avoided and I withdrew. “ How true, how much of that is me at times......

The main point that I got from the book today was that I am working more and more I am actually accomplishing less. How true is this! That feels like my week exactly. So, since I read this in the morning, I actually laid down while my kids were out with a friend, took the dogs for a walk & read a bit. I didn’t do the list of jobs that I try to get done when the kids aren't around. I didn’t beat myself up. I tried to rest & feed my spirit. “Man cannot live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.” (Mt. 4:4). I need to re-learn that I cannot live on a clean house, a done chore list, etc., etc. It sounds to simple, so elementary, but in a day I need to be so deliberate or I just go from one thing to the next.  When I was growing up, my sister & I and  my parents did not have fun. We went huckleberry picking in isolation with the mosquitos or to a nearby leech infested “lake” to float around in an inner tube. All I can remember is work, work, work except for Sundays when we did nothing. That was boring, I would rather work. I need to change that natural tendancy to look for the next thing that needs to be done & start really putting effort into the relationships around me –as Jesus would do I think.

Today, my little hiatus this am paid off. The kids came home & I was able to accomplish quite a bit; bake, finish switching the girls rms around, cleaned the water cooler, painted Eva’s bed. So I did better, but sitting here, typing this, did I miss the point? Shouldn’t I have gone to my neighbour who is going through a tough time & has repeatedly asked me to come for coffee? Isn't it relationally I am trying to improve as well? Agghh....sometimes I drive myself crazy with high expectation.

Anyways, I will keep reading, I am looking forwards to going to family camp for the wknd! I hope to find rest, finish reading my book and go from there....

ZZzzzzzzz.......

Lately I think God has been trying to grow me in a different area. That of serving Him even when I am completely exhausted. Yes, I know, I have young kids, I am doing a lot it’s ok to not be the sister super-Christian. I have come to terms –rather begrudgingly that I cannot do everything. So, I am ok if the house doesn’t remain  immaculate, the Suburban still has chocolate milk that spilled in January somewhere in it & my kids wardrobes are about 3 months behind. But am I ok if because I am so tired that I don’t pray? Of all the things the Lord asks me, I think praying is pretty much the easiest. You don’t have to exert physical  energy or do anything really. If I can make a meal or help my kids I should be able to pray.

2 or so weeks ago our basement flooded. Our bedroom is downstairs and so we are now upstairs awaiting new flooring for downstairs, my daughter’s room is also in a similar situation. Things are in a state of upheaval. I didn’t pray or read for almost week! It was uncanny that week, every night we would get odd phone calls late at night (everyone knows we are usually in bed by 9), kids waking up with weird issues. In other words, every night was reduced to about 6 hours of broken sleep. On day 6, I was reading an email when I came across the quote from Samuel Chadwick (above). Now I don’t think prayer is the only thing the devil fears, but it’s definitely a huge one. In one week of sleeplessness I became relatively immobilized for the Kingdom. It says, “If you falter in times of trouble how small is your strength!” (Pr. 24:10) My strength should be from my Lord, not the number of hours of sleep I get. Do I sound insane? Perhaps too expectant of His supernatural power? Even to my own ears I do, but I think it’s just my black & white personality emerging –and I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing. To try and put my expectations in perspective I think about believers around the world I’ve heard about. I read about a mother in Indonesia who is up at 4:30 to spend time with Him before dealing with her children, working a full day & then coming home to stay up until midnight working on evangelical radio programs.  She said she the Lord gives her strength because He calls her to it. There are other stories, refugees, people in bonded labour who experiences are similar to this woman’s. Exhausted, yet persevering.  

First Post

Well.............I have to say I am new to this as you will soon discover. I actually only read my first blog yesterday and it was that persons first time as well. So, here goes nothing & to hoping it becomes a positive thing, not another extension of my to do list. Already I've wasted a good 3 hours pecking around on the computer trying to set this thing up. I hope to post 2-3x/wk but who knows. I think there's a certain vulnerability to being on here which is among the reasons I've thus far dismissed the urge to start. Forget that, I only live once and blogging isn't exactly living on the edge....I should be able to handle it :)